Men, are you tired of being chastised for choosing to wash your red shirt with your wife’s white blouse?
Women, are you sick of your husbands bursting into laughter every time you comment on a football player’s homerun?
Parents, are you fed up with your kids telling you that you’re just not cool anymore?
Students, are you weary of teachers placing a big red “x” next to the math problems that you worked so hard to complete?
At this very moment, all of your frustrations are about to come to an end, because today….*dramatic pause for effect*.. is Everything You Do is Right Day! You heard correctly; for these short, precious twenty-four hours, you can do no wrong. So wash those red shirts with white blouses, you brilliant men, because your wife actually wanted a new pink shirt! If a football player scores a homerun, stand up and clap your hands, you clever women! Parents, if you insist on saying “fo shizzle” much to your children’s chagrin, it doesn’t matter, because you are the coolest people alive! Students, if you claim that the square root of 81 is 6, give your teacher a great big sneer when he tries to correct you, because you actually picked the right answer!
This is the day that absolutes are ignored, that logic and reason are abandoned, and that common sense is tossed out the window! According to Malcom Forbes, publisher of Forbes magazine, “Being right half the time beats being half-right all the time.” Well, today, you get to be right all the time, so go out and celebrate! Just be warned that today also applies to the innkeepers at the Iris Inn, so if you request fresh towels and instead receive a little shampoo bottle, we know you actually meant to ask for the shampoo. If you request pancakes and get waffles instead, we knew better and so corrected your error.
Warning: Not responsible for any laughing or teasing that may occur due to your exclamations of “rightness.”